Can a Parent’s Behavior in Court Affect Custody?

Absolutely. A parent’s behavior in court can play a decisive role in a custody case.

While many parents focus on parenting schedules, school routines, and communication outside the courtroom, judges also closely evaluate how each parent presents themselves in court. Courtroom conduct often reflects a parent’s ability to manage stress, follow rules, and act in the child’s best interests, qualities that are central to custody decisions.

Judges do not evaluate testimony alone. They observe demeanor, emotional control, respect for authority, and overall behavior. These observations can leave a lasting impression, one that may either strengthen or seriously undermine your position.

When you appear in court, you are not only presenting your case, but you are also demonstrating who you are as a parent. The following courtroom expectations are critical to protecting your custody interests.\

Courtroom Conduct That Matters

Be On Time

• Court schedules are limited, and judges will not delay proceedings for late arrivals.
• Arriving early accounts for traffic, parking, and security delays and shows responsibility.
• Punctuality signals respect for the court, your attorney, and the seriousness of your case.

Dress Appropriately

• Dress as you would for a professional job interview.
• Your appearance should communicate maturity, responsibility, and respect.
• Avoid clothing or accessories that are distracting or inappropriate, as first impressions matter.

Be Respectful at All Times

• Turn off or silence your phone; phone use during proceedings is not permitted.
• Do not bring food or drinks into the courtroom.
• Never interrupt the judge or attorneys.
• Remain calm and civil, even when emotions run high.
• Avoid arguing, raising your voice, or displaying emotional outbursts.

Judges and attorneys devote substantial time and effort to each case. Respecting the courtroom process demonstrates that you take your role, and your child’s future, seriously. Courts do not overlook disrespect. Even minor lapses in behavior can negatively affect how a judge views your credibility and fitness as a parent.

Professional courtroom conduct is not optional, it is essential. If you are unsure whether something is permitted or appropriate, consult your attorney in advance.

The following case illustrates how improper behavior can have serious, long-lasting consequences in a custody matter.

Lessons from In re Marriage of Garnhart, 2025 IL App (4th) 241511-U

Parents involved in custody disputes often concentrate on what happens at home: routines, discipline, and co-parenting. However, In re Marriage of Garnhart serves as a powerful reminder that a parent’s conduct, both inside and outside the courtroom, can be just as influential.

In this case, the court did not rely solely on allegations or testimony. The judge personally observed the mother’s behavior during the proceedings, and those observations became central to the custody decision.

What Happened in the Garnhart Case?

The mother initially had her parenting time restricted due to serious concerns, including:

• Physical and emotional abuse toward the father
• Harassment and stalking
• Angry outbursts during phone calls with the children
• Yelling and cursing in front of the children
• Hostility during parenting-time exchanges

As a result, the court ordered that her parenting time be supervised.

Importantly, the court also observed the mother’s behavior during the litigation itself. While in court, she was:

• Argumentative
• Vulgar
• Unable to control her emotions

Because the judge witnessed this conduct firsthand, it reinforced concerns about her ability to manage conflict and stress, skills essential to healthy parenting.

The Mother Asked to End Supervised Parenting Time

The mother later requested that supervision be removed, arguing that:

• Her circumstances had changed
• She was no longer a danger to her child
• Her relationship with the child had improved

After reviewing the evidence, the trial court denied her request. The judge found that:

• She continued to struggle with emotional regulation
• Her courtroom behavior remained relevant to assessing her parenting
• She failed to demonstrate meaningful, lasting change
• The evidence did not support removing supervision

The Appeal—and Why It Failed

On appeal, the mother argued that the trial court unfairly weighed her behavior and other factors. The Illinois Appellate Court rejected every argument and affirmed the trial court’s decision.

The appellate court agreed that the judge acted reasonably and properly considered her courtroom behavior as part of the overall custody analysis.

Why This Case Matters to You

The Garnhart case makes one thing clear: judges evaluate the full picture. How you conduct yourself during the case, especially in the courtroom, can either support your request for increased parenting time or severely damage it.

For parents navigating custody or parenting-time disputes, the takeaway is unmistakable:

• Stay calm.
• Show respect.
• Follow court orders.
• Demonstrate consistent, measurable improvement.
• Put your child’s best interests above personal conflict.

Your behavior in court can either strengthen your case or severely undermine it. In many custody matters, how you act speaks louder than any argument your attorney can make.

If you are involved in a custody or parenting-time dispute, preparation does not stop with legal strategy. It includes how you present yourself, every time you walk into the courtroom.